She'll Blow Away like Smoak
by LovesEternalFlame912
Summary: Post 4x09 Fic that just popped in my head first time writing Arrow Fanfic so forgive me if its OOC :D
1. Chapter 1

The faint pulse under his fingertips sprung Oliver into action.

"Hold on Baby, I'm going to get you help, hold on for me okay?" Oliver said digging into his pocket and pulling out a phone before realizing they are in the middle of the street and it would probably take an ambulance at least 30 minutes to get to them and that was thirty minutes he could not waste.

A soft moan alerted him to Felicity's eyes slowly opening.

"Felicity, baby everything will be okay just hold on to me tight." He said as he maneuvered her arms to be around his neck before he lifted her up as he stood and started sprinting down the road heading the direction of Star City General, which he was hoping that his directions weren't thrown off because he couldn't risk wasting any more time.

His feet kept hitting the pavement with a louder thud as a spring turned into a full out run and a small "Thank God." Escaped his lips when he saw the Giant H on the side of the building.

He busted through the doors of the emergency room "Help! Please I need help here." Several nurses saw and ran to him.

"What happened?" the nurse said as another one yelled for a gurney and a trauma team.

"She was shot, she lost a lot of blood you have to help her." He said trying to catch his breath.

As the trauma team placed Felicity on the gurney and ran down the hall Oliver ran with them every step of the way not letting go off his Felicity's hand.

As they rushed into the Operating Room, Oliver leaned over and looked at Felicity who now had an oxygen mask over her lips and IV's being placed in her arm.

"Sir you have to get out of the way and let us help her." One of the nurses says gently pushing Oliver to the wall.

Oliver watched as they worked on Felicity and ran his hands over his eyes to stop the tears that were forming in his eyes from falling but he knew they were as soon as he heard that loud continuous beep coming from the heart monitor.

 _Flat line_

Felicity was flatlineing and he was by her again as fast as he could "No baby don't do this to me come on baby don't do this not now."

"Get him out of here!" the surgeon yelled and three of the nurses took him out of the room,Oliver wanted to fight them and stay with Felicity but he knew it would take them away from helping her.

"Just bring her back to me please." He said to one of the nurses.

"We will try, I promise." One of the women said before they all reentered the room shutting the door and closing the blinds.

Oliver collapsed against the wall his knees buckling from under him as he sat on the floor and started to cry, here he was Oliver Queen a man who once thought he didn't need anyone, a man who kept those he loved at a distance away fearing they would get hurt or killed as a way to get to him, here he was more broken and defeated than he ever was facing any of his foes from the past.

Another nurse came down the hall and gently escorted him to the waiting room before grabbing his hand and asking him if there was anyone she could call to come sit with him.

 _Donna_

He immediately grabbed his phone and called John and was grateful he picked up on the first ring.

"Oliver man why are you calling me shouldn't you be celebrating your engagement right now." John said in a cheerful tone.

"John." Was the only word that would form and come out past the lump in Oliver's throat.

All John heard was accident, Felicity and Hospital and he said "I'll grab Donna I'll be right there."

Oliver hung up the phone and held it in his hands and leaned is head back against the wall, he wouldn't consider himself a religious man but right now he was praying to whatever god would listen to make sure Felicity would be fine and that she would live to be with him for the rest of their lives.

He wasn't sure how long his eyes were closed for when Donna came running in, followed by Lance, Diggle, Thea and Laurel

"Where is she? Where is my baby?" she said hysterical as Lance tried to comfort her.

"She's in surgery." Was the only words Oliver formed.

"What the hell happened?" Diggle said.

"We were in the limo and we stopped and I saw SUV's filled with ghosts they got out and started…" Oliver stopped and shuddered before clearing his throat and trying again "They started firing I grabbed felicity and shielded her but when they hit the driver I knew I had to get us out of there so I hopped up and got in the driver's seat and pulled away but Felicity got hit and she lost a lot of blood and before I was kicked out of the room she…she.."

"She what?" Donna said a torrent of tears splashing down to her face and the ground.

"She flat lined." He said and as soon as Donna heard the words she felt faint. "I need to sit down." Donna felt a tremendous weight hit her and she felt like she could barely breathe "She's my baby girl, I can't lose her she is all I have." Donna said as she collapsed into sobs once more.

Hearing her cries made Oliver go over to her and kneel in front of her "Hey we are not going to lose her, she is one of the most if not the strongest woman I have ever met, she will pull through I just know it."

Oliver grabbed Donna's hand and held it and pulled her up into a hug allowing both of their tears to fall on each other's shirts.

The six of them sat in silence for what seemed like hours, Oliver and Donna still held hands when the finally the surgeon that yelled at Oliver came out which cause Oliver to jump up immediately.

"How is she?" Oliver a part of him dreading the answer.

The surgeon took a deep breath "She's stable for now, she died a few times on the operating table but we were able to find all of the bullets in time so they didn't move and cause more permanent if not deadly damage.

"All the bullets?" Donna said shaking "How many times was she hit?"

"She had four entrance wounds we located one near the lung, two in her ribs and one in her spinal cord."

"Spinal Cord? That could cause paralysis right?" Diggle said.

"It could lead to paralysis yes we are running some tests right now but we won't know until if or when she wakes up."

"You don't know if she will wake up, what does that mean?" Donna once again asked.

"Miss Smoak stopped breathing for long extended periods of time that could lead to permanent brain damage which could leave her on a ventilator for the rest of her life but if I had to bet my money on her I would in a heartbeat she is putting up one hell of a fight."

"That's my girl." Donna said a small smile forming on her lips.

"Like I said it's up to her if she wakes up we are doing all we can on our side but in the end it is up to whether the patient is strong enough to fight."

"Can we see her?" Oliver asked.

"Sure but only one at a time for a few moments each."

All of them nodded.

"Who is first?"

Everyone looked at either Oliver or Donna.

"You go first." Oliver said "She's your daughter."

Donna nodded her head and kissed Oliver on the cheek before following the doctor down the hall.

When she entered the room she immediately saw her baby hooked up to every machine known to man and immediately crumbled to pieces as she walked over to her and kissed her on the forehead before sitting down in the chair and grabbing her daughter's hand.

"Hi baby it's me, I really don't know if you can hear me or not but we are all hear waiting for you, and we need you to wake up because we all need you to be okay, you are all I have left in this world, I know I embarrass you a lot of time with the way I dress and my bubbly personality but in the end I don't need my clothes or my shoes or my loud voice or any other thing in the end I am nothing without you so you need to wake up because if you don't I don't know what I will do, I need you baby girl, I will always need you even at time you don't need me."

Donna wiped the tears away from her eyes "The doctor says we can only have a few minutes with you so I'm going to go get Oliver okay?"

Donna stood up and kissed Felicity's forehead "Once they move you to your room I promise I won't leave your side until you wake up, I love you remember that."

Donna wiped the tears away before turning to the door and nearly shrieked when she saw Thea standing there.

"Sorry Oliver told us to go before him." Thea said pointing down the hall to where Diggle, Laurel and Quentin were.

"Oh okay you can go in."

Thea nodded and walked in the door silently clicking shut behind her before she turned to the woman in the bed, her future sister in law she should say as she remembered just how happy she was a few hours ago when she saw her brother finally propose to the woman of his dreams.

Thea walked over to the bed and stood by it looking down at Felicity "Hey so I am not really good with this sort of thing I never had to talk to someone who was hooked up to machines fighting for their life I mean my mom was killed right in front of me so didn't have to do it then but I guess I'll just speak how I feel, Oliver is a mess, we told him that he should come see you after Donna but he said he needed a few minutes before he got the courage to see you again, I have never seen this side of him before he doesn't want to talk to me or John he is just sitting there and it is scaring me I mean I know those five years on the island totally changed his life but you made it better you brought this light into his life at the moment when he was surrounded in darkness and I am afraid that I will lose him completely to the darkness once more if you do not wake up, so I need you to do me a favor okay I need you to wake up because I have already lost so much I don't think I could survive losing him or you, so you just wake up for us because we have a wedding to plan you have come too far to give your happily ever after up now."

Thea gave Felicity's hand a squeeze before exiting the room and allowing Laurel and Quentin to come in.

The two of them weren't sure of what to say or do so they just held hands and placed hands over Felicity and said as many prayers as they knew hoping to God she woke up.

There was one thing you never wanted to do to John Diggle and that was mess with his family, the people he loved because when you did you were asking for a whole lot of hurt heading your way and that is what Damien Darhk had coming.

Because he messed with his Family.

John sat on the edge of the bed and looked at a woman he had come to admire, respect and love over the past three and a half years he knew her the only woman he knew besides Lyla who could put him in his place and he knew it.

John grabbed her hand and sighed "You already know what I am going to say, you know how important you are to me and not just Team Arrow wise but you mean so much more to me than that you are like my little sister and although I know you can defend yourself I feel the need to protect you and I must say seeing you like this makes me kind of feel bad for Darhk in a way because he just pissed off the two men in Star City you do not want to mess with."

"So why don't you open those eyes soon so I can see that beautiful smile once more eh? Until then just know that the men who caused this will be dealt with personally until I see fit they have been punished enough, so you do me a favor and you Fight, since I know that is your third favorite thing behind Oliver and Technology of course but you fight and you come back to us okay?"

John leaned forward and kissed her forehead "I love you Felicity, and don't you worry your big brother and your man will avenge this." He said before getting up and exiting the room.

He walked down the hall to the waiting room and saw Oliver sitting in a corner away from everyone.

He sighed as he walked over and sat next to him putting a hand on his shoulder "Oliver man it's your turn."

"I don't think I can right now."

"Listen to me you need to go see her you need to if you don't the darkness that is threatening you right now will completely consume you and you will be no good to yourself or anyone, just think of her sleeping."

"A sleep she might never wake up from."

"Now you know she will and if anybody can get her too it's the man that she loves, go to her man."

Oliver looked over and saw John smirk a little before nodding his head and walking down the hall.

As he got closer to the door he felt the pain in his chest increase and he felt his breathes get slower as he walking through the door.

His breath stopped all together when he saw her.

Donna looked out the window at nothing in particular she just needed something else to focus on because the walls and the tiles in the hospital were making her sick.

Quentin came up and placed a hand on her shoulder causing her to jump a little.

"Sorry I just came to check on you."

"I'm alright, I mean I'm not alright but God I do not even know what I am anymore I just keep replaying the last time I saw her and how happy she was and how she was glowing and now she is so pale and cold and she seems lifeless and a part of me fears she will never wake up and I don't know what I will do if she doesn't she is my baby girl she is all I have Quentin if I lose her I will have nothing left."

Quentin collected her in his arms as she sobbed.

"What do you need me to do?" Quentin said

"Nothing but there is something I need to do." Donna said before walking out.

Oliver sat down in the chair next to the bed and just stared at Felicity, His Felicity, the usually bubbly, babbling beauty was now pale and quiet and it made his heart shred even more, he grabbed on to her hand and kissed each knuckle.

"Please come back to me." Was all he kept saying because he didn't know what else to say but those words because he didn't want to live in the what ifs he didn't want to imagine a life where he didn't have Felicity that world that he lived in so long ago that he used to take comfort in now look cold and dark and he did not want any part in it.

"I can't go back Felicity, I can't you changed everything there is no turning back now but I can go back into the darkness to avenge this."

He jumped a little when he heard the door open and close and sprung up to see Donna there.

"Are you alright?" He asked.

Donna nodded as she closed the door.

"I needed to talk to you."

"Alright." He said looking at with concern.

"I need you to promise me something."

"Anything."

"This man this Damien fella he has went after my daughter twice now and I will not stand for a third so I need you to do me a favor, I need you to go after him and make him pay for what he has done I am usually not one to condone violence or murder but he started it when he went after my daughter, so you and John and whoever else you can find need to find Damien and make him pay and all of his goons that shot my daughter too, he will not get a third chance at my daughter not as long as I have air in my lungs, I will stay with Felicity you go and get that son of a bitch can you do that?"

Oliver stared at her in shock not use to seeing this side of Donna "Yeah I think I can."

Oliver walked over to Felicity and kissed her forehead before walking out to John and the rest of them.

"Let's Go." He said before walking towards the exit.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2.

Donna sat by Felicity's bedside holding her daughter's cold hand and counting how many times her daughter's chest rose and fell.

She sighed as she got up and stretched before looking at her watch and noticed it was going on five o'clock in the morning, Oliver left four hours ago and she hasn't heard from him since, getting worried she grabbed her cellphone from the table and dialed his number, hanging up on the third ring when Quentin came in with coffee.

"Hi." Was all he said.

"Hey." Donna said rubbing her bloodshot eyes. "Any news?"

"No I called everyone at the precinct no one has seen or heard from Damien since the Christmas Party from hell."

Donna chuckled "It was a… It was a holiday party." She said with a little chuckle.

"Right, anyway I brought some coffee and bagels for you so you can at least have something in your stomach."

"Thank you." Donna said looking at her daughter once more.

"How is she?"

"The Doctors say she's still unconscious and that she has some bullet fragments still lodged in her torso but other than that they won't know how bad the damage until she wakes up, when she wakes up, if she wakes up." Donna said with her voice cracking as she got the last four words out.

"She will wake up, you have to have hope."

"I gave up on hope a long time ago." Donna said grabbing the coffee before sitting down beside Felicity Quentin sighed as he sat on the other side of the bed facing Donna.

"Would you like me to call someone from your family to come be with you?" Quentin asked generally concerned about Donna.

"My Parents are dead, I have no brothers or sisters, the only family I have left is laying right here in front of me hooked up to every machine known to man."

"What about Felicity's father, I could give him a call."

Donna gave out a harsh and weak chuckle "Yeah you would have to find him first and believe me you won't be able to."

Donna noticed Quentin's facial expression and went on "Felicity's father left when Felicity was five and I haven't seen him since the day he drove off leaving us alone on the doorstep."

"He just left you and his daughter?"

"Yeah to be honest I saw it coming he was more at the office than he was at home, but Felicity never gave up on him, you know she sat on that doorstep for six hours after he left because she thought he was coming back, I can still hear the sobs she made when I told her that he was never coming back, it breaks your heart when your child is in pain, I can barely survive seeing her like this."

"So he hasn't been in contact since? Not even with his own daughter?"

"Nope I haven't seen him since that day he is probably dead for all I know and Good Riddance, for the past two and a half decades it has been me and her against the world."

Donna once again grabbed Felicity's hand "And it always will be."

Quentin got up "Well I'm going to see if we have any leads but I'll be back."

Quentin got up and walked to the door before stopping to turn "I honestly believe she will wake up, I think she loves you too much to leave you, you just keep watch over her and when she is ready she'll come back because if there is one thing I know about your daughter it's that she doesn't give up on the people she loves."

Quentin opened the door and was met with the doctor.

"Hi." The doctor said looking at Donna before coming in "I need to speak with you."

Oliver stood on the rooftop of the building across the street from one of Damien's known hideouts which now look completely deserted and abandoned.

The cold air hit him and he shivered, usually the cold didn't he had grown accustomed to it on the island but since the shooting all he felt was coldness and that coldness was slowly being taking over by rage.

Diggle, Laurel and Thea looked over to him and Diggle nodded at Thea before she spoke "Oliver there is no one here we should check out the other locations maybe we will get something there."

"No something or someone has to be here."

Just as Thea was about to say something she saw a black SUV pull up, the anger that raged in his chest nearly exploded from him when he saw Damien come out of backseat and fix his suit jacket before walking into the building with his ghosts following quickly behind.

"We're going in." Oliver said almost hopping off the roof before Thea grabbed his arm "Oliver we are outnumbered and out armed this would be suicide."

"I need to get him Thea, he needs to answer to what he did."

"So what you are going to go in there and get killed for what, what will it prove?"

"Are you seriously telling me that I shouldn't go after the man that put Felicity in the hospital?"

"No I'm saying that if you let this anger and rage take over then Damien does win, I promise you we will get him and he will pay but we need more time to make a plan."

Oliver yanked his arm away and paced the roof.

He stared at the SUV that Damien left unattended.

"I have an Idea."

Donna looked at the Doctor bewildered "But you said that you wouldn't know if she was paralyzed until she woke up."

"Miss Smoak…"

"Donna."

"Donna, all I am saying to you is that there was damage to the spinal cord and we don't know how much damage was caused until we see for ourselves."

"So you want to cut open my daughter again, after you said that you wouldn't know until she woke up for a theory."

"Donna I promise to you nothing will happen to your daughter."

"Hello can you not see my daughter unconscious, something did happen to her." Donna took a deep breath and bowed her head "I'm sorry I know you are just doing your job, I'm just scared I will never be able to hear my daughter's voice again or see her beautiful blue eyes again and now you are telling me that she might have damage to her spinal cord it's just a lot to take in."

"I know and I'm sorry but I promise you this is a simple, standard procedure that I have done a hundred times and I promise you I will take great care of your daughter."

Donna looked at Felicity "Do it."

Oliver was walking towards the SUV with Thea when Thea's phone rang.

Oliver looked at her before dragging her behind a rock.

"You brought your phone?"

"Yes and I gave my number to Donna so that if anything happened to Felicity we would know."

"Give me it."

Oliver looked up and around from the rock making sure the coast was clear before answering.

"Hello?"

"Oliver is that you?"

"Yeah."

"Why are you whispering?"

"It's…I'm taking care of something is something wrong? Is Felicity okay?"

"She's alright, she hasn't woken up yet she's being prepped for surgery right now."

"Surgery for what?"

"The doctor wants to check out her spinal cord damage see if there is anything he can do."

"I'm coming right now."

"No you stay and do whatever it is you are about to do and if you see Damien tell him that if he thinks your bad wait until he meets Mama Smoak."

Oliver couldn't help but chuckle a little "You got it call me as soon as you hear something."

"Will do and you three stay safe."

Oliver hung up the phone and punched the rock making his knuckles bruise and bleed.

"Oliver what's wrong?"

"Felicity is in surgery again."

"Do you want to go I can Radio Digg and we can get out of here?"

"No this ends... Tonight."

"Okay."

Oliver and Thea ran over to the building and placed exploding arrows in different locations

"Alright let's go."

Damien stood in front of his ghosts.

"Alright men so far Oliver Queen has been quiet and my contact in the hospital says that Miss Smoak in unconscious, Great Job but now we have to keep it so Oliver Queen does not run for Mayor so we must end Oliver Queen Tonight, and "

The Explosion outside nearly rocked Damien off his feet and caused all the Ghosts to run out.

The Cries from the Black Canary made the Ghosts cover their ears making easy work for Thea, Oliver and Diggle to shoot them with their weapons.

Out of the corner of his eye Oliver saw Damien running and chased after him.

He hopped rooftop to rooftop before jumping down into an alley cutting of Damien's escape.

"We Meet Again, I guess you are here to take me to Oliver Queen." Damien said with a cocky smile.

"Not Exactly."

"Are you here to kill me?"

Oliver stared at Damien who looked actually excited to hear the answer.

The sound of gunfire erupted causing both Damien and Oliver to run for cover, Oliver cursed as he saw a ghost grabbed Damien into the SUV and Drive off.

He breathed heavily as Diggle walked up to him.

"Do we have him?"

Diggle pulled out one of Felicity's tablets and saw a red dot moving down the street.

"We got him."

The snow started falling outside the Hospital window.

Donna rubbed her eyes and took a sip out of her fourth cup of coffee or was it her fifth she wasn't sure.

Felicity still wasn't back yet and she heard nothing since she was taken in.

"Hey." A voice behind her said making her jump.

"Sorry didn't mean to scare you." Lance said.

"It's alright I'm just a little jumpy."

"How's Felicity?"

"Back in surgery they are trying to see how much damage was done to her spine."

"How are you?"

"I'm fine, what are you doing back so soon?"

"I didn't want to leave you alone for too long."

Donna scoffed "Why? We're not in a relationship you don't have to worry about me."

"Donna."

"Sorry I don't mean to be snippy I just I hate this I absolutely hate it, a mother is supposed to protect her children and I couldn't protect my baby and now she is having surgery after surgery to save her life and I'm here all alone and it sucks."

Lance walked over to her and pulled her into a hug letting her sob into his shoulder.

"You're not alone you have me." He said holding her tight.

The lair seemed empty to Oliver without hearing Felicity's nonstop babbling or her fingers hitting computer keys.

He watched the computer screen as the red dot came to another stop and wrote down the address.

"This is his fifth stop of the night, should we go see where it is."

Diggle sighed as "Oliver we need to talk, I think you should sit this next part out."

"What?"

"This hit too close to home for you and your emotions are going to take over and I don't want you to do something reckless."

"Are you forgetting that this man nearly killed me and Felicity and is the reason Felicity is fighting for her life right now?"

"Yes I know that and believe me I am the second person in line after you to destroy Damien and make him pay I just…I almost lost one friend this week I don't want to lose another."

"I'll be careful I promise."

"Look Oliver I don't know what your plan is but whatever it is I have your back."

Oliver nodded as Thea came in.

"Oliver, Donna called Felicity is out of surgery but she didn't tell me what was wrong."

Oliver looked at Diggle "Go me and Thea will take a look at this location."

Oliver nodded and walked out.

When he got to the hospital he saw Donna sobbing on a chair in the hospital hallway, his heart felt like it just got stabbed over and over and his breathing quickened as he walked up and sat down next to her.

"Donna?"

Donna looked at him "Oh Oliver."

"What happened?"

"The Doctor just came and told me the damage to her spinal cord is permanent, She'll never walk again."

Oliver scooped Donna up into a hug and held on tight.

Oliver opened the door to Felicity's room and took a deep breath before walking in.

 _Felicity is paralyzed._

That's the thought that kept running through his head as he sat on Felicity's bed and grabbed her hand.

He glanced over his shoulders at her legs that were barely visible under the blankets and the thought that he would never see her walking again tore his heart wide open.

He would never see her stand to greet him after a mission, he would never hear the click of her heels against the wooden floors at home, and He wouldn't see her walk down the aisle or play with their children if children were even in the cards now.

But he wouldn't leave her, they beat so many obstacles together and this was no different.

"Hey baby, so I know when you wake up you will be confused and angry by what's happened but I want you to know that this will not change our future okay, It will not change how much I love you and it will not change my mind about marrying you, we will face this together and we will beat this together and I promise you I will get Damien and then we can focus on our wedding which I'm sure your mother will have about ninety seven percent of the say in as she does everything else, but just know that I am here for you and I will always be here for you and nothing or no one will ever change that because like I said earlier you are the one who lights my way without you I can't beat the darkness but with you I can destroy it once and for all so you get all the rest you need right now because when you do wake up we have a hell of a lot of work to do."

Oliver leaned forward and kissed her forehead holding his lips to her skin for a few extra minutes before leaning back and looking at her "I love you Felicity Smoak."

Oliver got up and walked towards the door grabbing on to the wall for support when his knees buckled and he sobbed against the wall making a dent in it when his fist collided with it.

He recovered and started walking again when he heard a voice from behind him.

"Oli-ver"

Oliver turned around "Felicity?"

Her eyes opened.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3.

 _Two Weeks Later._

"You know I could get used to you carrying me down the stairs." Felicity said as they walked down the stairs in the loft.

Oliver chuckled "I would carry you to the ends of the earth if I had to."

"Even to Bali?"

"Even to Bali."

As they reached the bottom part of the stairs Oliver gently placed her in the wheel chair before kneeling in front of her "Are you sure you don't want to come tonight?"

"No I I'm not ready not yet."

"I don't feel comfortable leaving you alone, I can call Donna."

"No, please no I finally got her out of the house for a date with Lance so she could stop babying me I will be fine, promise."

"Okay well I'll be on the radio if you need anything before tonight call me okay?"

"Okay, Love you."

"Love you too."

Oliver leaned forward and kissed her before walking out the door.

Felicity sighed as she looked around the empty loft before turning and going over to the desk Oliver set up.

She grabbed her pain pills and took two.

"That's the third time today you've gone into the bottle." A voice said to her from behind.

Felicity turned to see something that made her think she had gone crazy because she literally saw herself, her old self the version of her that wore all black to match her hair and dark lipstick and metal jewelry the her she thought she left a long time ago.

Felicity closed her eyes "You're not real and when I open my eyes you will be gone."

Felicity opened her eyes to nothing and sighed "I have got to a stop hallucinating." She said before turning on her computer.

"Who says I am a hallucination what if I'm just your inner thoughts brought to life?"

"Well then you can go away because I already know what I'm thinking." She said "My god I'm talking to myself I have gone crazy." She said before typing some more.

Oliver walked into the lair to see Thea waiting for him "Where's Felicity?"

"She didn't want to come tonight she wants to work at home."

"Again? Are you sure she is alright by herself?"

"I told her if she needed anything she knows where I am."

"I just wish we could help her somehow I mean the way life is now is really different and she shouldn't do it alone."

Oliver was about to say something when John walked in obviously panicked.

"John what is it?"

"Lyla's been kidnapped by some of the men from Argus?"

"Lyla why would they take Lyla."

"Because Andy told them too."

Felicity sat at her computer and typed when her elbow hit over her water bottle causing it to spill all over the floor.

"Damn it."

"Need some help there?" Goth Felicity asked.

"No I'm fine." Felicity said struggling to pick the water bottle off the floor.

"Look at you, you're helpless what happened to me you used to be so strong and now you're weak and paralyzed and alone, he'll leave you know sooner or later he will get tired of you and leave you just like our father did."

"SHUT UP!" Felicity screamed

Her phone ringing brought her back to reality.

"Hello?" Felicity said her voice shaking.

"Felicity are you okay?"

"Oliver, yeah sorry did you make it to the lair?"

"Yeah I'm here and look Felicity I think you should really come, we could really use your help."

"Oliver we-"

"Lyla's been kidnapped."

"Oh my god and Sara?"

"She's fine she was with the sitter, Felicity we really need you."

"Okay I can do it from here just let me know what you need."

Felicity typed violently on her computer keys as she hacked into the building's security codes,

"Alright guys it is safe to go in." she said into the radio.

"Alright let's do this." Diggle said.

The next twenty minutes were a blur to Felicity all she remembered was her eyesight getting blurry and her hitting a key and everything turned red.

She watched in horror as the security system she just turned off came back on and she heard Oliver's voice over the radio.

"Felicity what's going on?"

"I...I don't know I must have hit something, I don't know what to do."

The next thing she heard was bullets being fired and people shouting before the radio went dead.

"Oliver!" she shouted.

"See what you did, you got them killed, did those bullets paralyze your brain stem too, or are you just too drugged up to even touch a computer these days, I won't be surprised if Oliver does leave you after this, that is if you haven't killed him.

"Shut up, please shut up." She said laying her head down before everything went dark.

When she awoke it was to Oliver shaking her and yelling her name, and Diggle looking on worried.

"Felicity!"

"What…What happened, Oliver you're alright?"

"Yeah we are all fine, Diggle got Lyla just in time, what happened?"

"I honestly don't know one minute everything was good and the next, maybe I just can't do this anymore." Felicity said.

"What are you talking about?"

"I can't use my legs Oliver! I can't do anything right anymore." Felicity groaned as she used her arms to stand up holding her whole body weight up with them "I can't be a member of the team anymore." She said before sitting back down.

"John can you give us a minute?"

John nodded before leaving the loft.

Oliver looked down at Felicity who stared out the window not looking at him.

"Felicity, you are and will always be a member of the team, we can't survive without you."

"I nearly got you guys killed Oliver."

"Well yeah but you are allowed to make mistakes you're human we all make them."

"Yeah but I can't afford to make them when I have people's lives in my hands, I'm not a superhero Oliver, I have a spinal cord injury I might not ever walk again."

"That's the worst case scenario, but you are a member of this team and your super power is right there." Oliver said pointing to her brain causing Felicity to smile.

Oliver kneeled in front of her "I know this is a big adjustment for you it is for me too but we can get through this together, I'm not going anywhere even if you push me away I'm still going to stay right here and so is the team so you take as long as you want we will be waiting."

Oliver kissed her "We have to go back out for a little bit but Donna called and said she was on her way back, I'll be home later."

Felicity watched him leave again.

"One day he will leave and not come back."

"Shut up."

Oliver walked outside and didn't see Diggle, and pulled out his phone to see a text from him.

 _Ran out to do something will meet you at the restaurant._

Oliver wanted to ask what he was doing but figured it was none of his business.

When Oliver walked into the restaurant he was waved over by Thea who was sitting next to Alex.

"How's Felicity?" Thea asked when they hugged.

"I don't know but I hope I helped her."

"Well Alex called us to the meeting because he has news and it's not good."

"Alright what's the news?" Oliver asked sitting down.

"I got news earlier tonight that someone else put a bid in to be mayor of Star City."

"What who?"

"Don't know the name yet but I figured we could map out a strategy for the debate."

"Whoa debate what debate?"

"Well now that there are two of you running there needs to be a debate so that voters can see both sides on the issues currently plaguing the city but they can also get very personal too so I need to know if you have any secrets I need to know about?"

Oliver thought back to a few months ago when he found out he was a father to a child he didn't even know existed but knew he could never bring that up.

"No not that I can think of."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Alright then let's get to work."

Oliver walked in to Donna sitting on the couch covered in a blanket and saw Felicity's wheelchair empty.

"Where's Felicity?"

"In bed." Was Donna's only answer.

"How did she?"

"I helped her."

"Donna…"

"Look Oliver I'm going to be straight with you do you still want to marry my daughter?"

"What? Of course I still want to marry her why would you ask me that?"

"Because you keep leaving her that's why, she was shot Oliver and nearly killed and you took off before I even got to the hospital and now you just leave at random times during the day, I know Felicity's condition is new to you and I can understand if it is a burden or if you can't handle it but you need to tell her and you need to tell her now because I have seen the look of abandonment too many times on my daughter's face some of my own doing to watch her go through it again, I will not stand and watch another man that she loves hurt her again."

Oliver sighed and sat down on the couch and looked at Donna.

"Donna, I love your daughter in the hospital I said that I was with her through better or for worse and I meant that."

"Then why do you keep leaving?"

"I can't tell you that at least not now."

Donna scoffed and stood up "Goodnight Oliver."

"Donna."

"Goodnight." She said walking up the stairs.

Oliver rubbed his eyes before walking up the stairs as well.

He could tell Felicity wasn't sleep by the lack of soft snoring when he walked in, her back was towards him and she was stretched out on his side which made him smile, ever since the shooting she would sleep as close to him as possible and he didn't mind in the least.

He walked around the edge and sat down it was then he realized Felicity was crying as soon as she saw him she wiped her eyes "Hey I didn't hear you come in."

"Why are you crying?"

"It's nothing its stupid."

"Felicity it's not stupid what is wrong?"

"I hate this, I hate that I can't walk I hate it that I can't even pick up a bottle if it drops on the floor I just hate it!"

Oliver laid down and scooped her in his arms.

"I know you're scared I'm scared too but we will get through this, I'm not going anywhere I will say it every minute of every day if it will make you believe me but we are in this together."

"Promise."

"I promise."

Felicity looked at the window and saw the Goth Version of her standing by the window.

"He's still going to leave just you wait and see."

Felicity closed her eyes tight before succumbing to sleep.

Alex and Oliver were working in the office.

"So I think if we do another breakfast at the firehouse that could get us their votes."

"Yeah that's a great idea." Oliver said staring out the window.

"Oliver are you alright you seem out of it."

"I'm just… I worried about Felicity."

"Yeah I hear she's having a hard time."

"Yeah I just wish there was some way I could help her."

"You are just by supporting her and being there for her when she is ready she will come around."

"Yeah so any idea who this other runner is?"

"That would be me."

Alex and Oliver look towards the door to see a woman standing in the doorway.

She walked over to Oliver "Hi Mr. Queen I am Ruve Adams it's nice to meet you finally."

Felicity sat staring out the window and sighed, she felt so useless and she hated feeling like that.

There was a knock on the door and she heard Donna say "I'll get it."

Felicity sighed before turning in her chair seeing Diggle walking through the door.

"Hey John." Felicity said with a smile.

"Hello Beautiful." John said kissing her on the cheek "Hey are you doing anything today?"

"No just sitting around here why?"

"I need you to come with me if you would like?"

"Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise."

"Okay." Felicity said a little skeptical.

"I'll grab your coat." Donna said.

As soon as they got in the car Diggle blindfolded Felicity.

"Seriously dig with the blindfold?"

"Well it wouldn't be a surprise if you saw it before I unveiled it would it?"

"You have a point."

"So sit back and relax because nothing is going to happen to you as long as I'm here."

When they got to their destination Felicity heard Diggle and he carried her a really long distance.

"You know you don't have to carry me the whole way right?"

"Yeah well I just thought I would get my weights in for today."

Felicity chuckled "Can we take the blindfold off now?"

"No not yet."

Felicity knew they walked into a building because she felt the heat hit her body and she knew she stepped into an elevator when she heard a ding and doors open.

She had to say she was shocked when Diggle took the blindfold off and she saw the lair.

"The lair? You brought me to the lair?"

"Yeah because this is where you belong?" Diggle said walking her up the stairs and sitting her in a new chair that supported her.

"Diggle..."

"Listen to me." Diggle said grabbing a chair and rolling it up to her so he could sit face to face with her.

"I can't imagine what you are going through or how you are feeling but I don't want to ever hear you say again that you can't be a part of this team because without you there is no team, sure there would still be me and Thea and Oliver but you can't have the brawn without the brains and that is you, you are the glue that holds this team together, you are the reason I get to go home to my family every night safe, there are very few people I trust my life Felicity but I need you to know you are Number two only coming in second to Lyla, And I don't see how this team or any of us will survive if you aren't here to help us out because I can't imagine walking through that door every night and not hearing your unstoppable babbling or to hear you hitting those computer keys with such force that they are going to break, I know that you feel like your life is forever changed but it's not because my best friend is still here on earth and she is the most strongest, most bad ass woman on the planet and not even a wheelchair is going to stop her."

"I almost got you killed John."

"But you didn't you are allowed to make mistakes Felicity we all make them, you making a mistake won't make me think of you any less as I do now it actually makes me admire you more, you will always be a member of this team even if you don't feel like it, this team is your family and this is your home."

"But how can I even get down here anymore I can't walk up the stairs and you and Oliver can't carry me all the time even if you wanted too."

Diggle smiled "I'm so glad you asked that."

Diggle turned the chair around and pushed her towards the edge where she saw a new ramp where the steps used to be "I put that bad boy in last night and there is also one upstairs so you can also get into the building as well."

"You did all of this for me?"

Diggle kneeled in front of her "Of course I did, you're my best friend not only that but your practically like my little sister so I will always feel the need to protect you but I want you to be happy and I know this is what makes you happy, hacking into servers and taking down firewalls and doing all the other techie stuff you do that I can't think the names of right now."

Felicity chuckled and John held her hands.

"Remember when Sara first joined the team and you were worried because you didn't know why we needed you if we had her?"

"Yes."

"And do you remember what I told you?"

"You said that I was irreplaceable."

"Because you are we couldn't find anyone as smart as you and surely not someone whose spirit is so bright she lights up a room when she walks through the door you are the foundation to this team Felicity and we need you so why don't you help us out here and help me out and say you'll come back, cause without you we are goners for sure."

Felicity looked at Diggle to see tears forming in his eyes and sighed before speaking.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N So I decided to take a little break from writing one reason being I work 50 hours a week usually and the past two weeks I have pulled 70 hours each week, another reason is I was really sure people were still reading this but my brain told me to finish it so finish it I shall I've placed a time jump in this since I wanted to keep up with the current episode (plus I kind of want to get to the angst and get it over with) so keep reading and enjoy

Chapter 4.

The past 72 hours seemed like a Blur to Felicity. In that time she had literally found out Oliver had a son, saved said son and then watched as Oliver had an emotional reunion with him right in front of her very eyes.

She sat on the balcony looking out into the sunset and sighed.

She didn't exactly know where Oliver was right now she asked her Mom to take her back to the loft as soon as she saw Oliver hug the child.

She was grateful that William wasn't hurt and that he was back with his mom.

But she was Furious with Oliver.

Sure in his head he probably thought it was best and he probably made up all the best reasons for it but they made a promise many months ago back when all they did was be happy and in love.

 _It had been one day since they left Star City behind and now they were on a plane to god knows where and Felicity didn't care because for the first time in her life she felt stable and secure, which was a new feeling for her but before they started whatever they were about to start she needed to clear the air._

" _You ok?" Oliver asked bringing her back to reality._

" _Yeah, I'm fine."_

" _You Sure? You look like you are a thousand miles away."_

 _Felicity sighed and turned to him._

" _I just I need you to know something."_

" _Okay what is it?"_

" _After what happened with my Dad and Copper it made me very cautious about the men I trust and why I do trust you in my head, my heart is a different story and I just want to know that I am deciding to trust you with it like you trust me with yours I just need to know that if ever and whenever the time comes that you will trust me with any secret or any action that you know or do because whatever you tell me it won't make me love you any less then.. Oh god I'm babbling again, I really need to stop doing that."_

 _She bowed her head and heard Oliver chuckled "Felicity look at me."_

 _Felicity looked at him and saw him smile "I promise I won't keep anything from you from now on."_

 _Felicity smiled and leaned in to kiss him._

"I am such an idiot." Felicity said hitting her hand against the wheel to her chair.

"Felicity." He said lowly behind her.

She turned around and glared at him before turning her chair and rolling right past him.

"Is William okay?" she said not glancing at him.

"He's fine he is on his way back to Central City with his mom."

"That's good."

"Felicity I owe you-"

"You don't owe me anything because this is what you do, you know I thought you had changed that the secret keeping Oliver, the Oliver that kept things to himself and didn't give a damn about anyone else's feelings, the man who wanted to do everything alone and shut everyone out, I thought that Oliver was gone."

"He is gone Felicity you changed the way I am, I am a better man because of you."

"I wish I could believe that but you lied to me Oliver, and this isn't some miniscule lie like "I left the toilet seat up." Or "I forgot to put the laundry in the dryer." You had a kid the whole time you knew me and didn't say a word."

"I didn't know about him until Central City when we went to help Barry."

Felicity heard this and all of a sudden it all made sense.

"That's why you were acting so strangely, when we came home from that trip I asked you what was wrong and you told me it didn't matter anymore, but it matters Oliver it matters to me, why didn't you tell me?"

"Because Samantha told me if I told anyone I would never be able to see William and I just found out about him I didn't want to lose him."

"So you kept it from your girlfriend, your best friend and your sister the three people you could have trusted to take that secret to the grave for you to obey the demands of your brand new baby mama, but you could tell Barry?"

"Thea knows too." Oliver said before he could stop himself.

Felicity scoffed "So it was just me you couldn't trust then, Wow my mother was right."

"About what?"

"The fact that people can never change even when you want them too, I would of kept your secret Oliver, Samantha would have never known that I knew because if you had asked me to keep it I would have locked it so deep down that it would have never came out but you didn't trust me, which for the life of me I will never be able to comprehend because I thought if you wanted to marry someone then you had to have one hundred percent trust in that person I guess with us it was just one sided and boy did I make the wrong call."

"Felicity I didn't know he was alive the last I heard she had an abortion, I didn't know that she kept him."

"And I am not blaming you for that, I am blaming you for the fact that you knew about this for months and the fact that you don't trust me as much as I trust you, I just I don't understand Oliver and I don't think you can make me."

"Felicity I do trust you, I trusted you from the first moment I met you but this was different I knew if you found out about William."

"I would do what exactly? Give you an ultimatum? Tell you that you had to decide between me and your Son? Do you honestly think that little of me? You should know after being abandoned by my own father that I would never want that for your son, I would've loved him because he is a part of the man that I love he is a part of you and I would never ask you in a million years to pick between me and him and if you knew me you would know that but you didn't care about how I would feel or what I would do you made that decision by yourself because you clearly didn't trust me enough to let me make one or to even include me in, how can I marry a man who doesn't trust me?"

Felicity looked down at the ring and slowly slipped it off her finger "I thought I would never see the day when I would willingly take this off, I always thought it would be on my finger forever. I guess I was wrong"

Felicity laid the ring down on the end table and rolled to the door.

"Felicity."

Felicity stopped as soon as her hand hit the handle "I will still support your campaign and I will still help with Team Arrow but I need some time to think about us and to decide if I want there to be an us in the future."

Oliver ran up and closed the door holding his hand against "I'm not letting you leave like this, I still need to explain."

"You've already explained enough, loud and clear."

Felicity yanked on the door causing Oliver's hand to fall and she rolled away.

Oliver closed the door and banged his forehead against it before sliding down his eyes never leaving the ring that was on the table.

##

Felicity entered the lab at Palmer Tech and was met with Curtis who didn't fail to notice she had been crying.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing I just came to give something back to you." She said handing the bio stimulant back, "I don't need it anymore."

"I don't understand."

"It's fine just destroy it or give it to someone else, I appreciate and love you for the time and effort that you put into it but I won't need it to walk down the aisle."

"Okay I don't understand what is going on but I am not letting you not use this if anyone deserves to walk again it is you."

"I can't I'm sorry." Felicity said walking into the lab and shutting the door.

Curtis pulled out his phone "Donna, we have a situation here."

##

Oliver walked into the lair and turned the lights on, he couldn't stay at the house one more minute after Felicity left and he was hoping she would go to the lair so he could talk to her but a part of him knew she needed space.

He walked up the ramp and towards the computer and slowly traced his fingertips across the keyboard.

He spun around when he heard a gun cock.

"Jesus Oliver, You trying to give me a heart attack?"

"Sorry, I didn't notice you when I came in."

"Oh I wasn't here I was alerted by the silent alarm and came to see what was going on."

"What are you doing here?"

"Felicity left me."

Diggle didn't say a word just sighed and put a hand on his friend's shoulder.

##

Donna walked into the darkened lab room and looked around "Felicity, baby are you in here?"

The lights turned on momentarily blinding Donna before her eyes readjusted and she spotted Felicity in the middle of the floor.

Donna immediately ran over to Felicity and hugged her crying daughter.

A/N so this might be awful but it's the best I could do on no sleep so I hope you still like it


End file.
